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First Poem After Parting

That is what I needed, isn’t it? This home, quiet
as daylight, grass on the opposite aspect of those home windows

fading from gold to inexperienced like a lady taking
off her make-up. I’ve waited and waited to carry  

my grief. Tied her up in rubbish baggage underneath garments
I intend to donate, slipped her within the aspect pockets  

of suitcases and empty slots between cigarettes
in packs I carry all the time in multiples. I skilled her  

to face behind doorways, to exit as laughter from my
throat. Waved her in any respect the protests the place I hoped  

she would slip out of my fist like a pink banner
printed with the numerous names of justice. And sure,  

I’ve greater than survived this manner, not noticing
how she grew and grew, the way in which my physique pinned  

to the aisle seat in coach is all of a sudden a roar pointing
on the clouds. Pricey God, I need to be made from extra  

than this. Whereas he packed, I wiped the counters,
the spines of poets lining the partitions of the attic, workplace,  

kitchen, the porcelain surfaces, of all traces of him; I did
what I couldn’t that evening the leaves have been darkish with hurricane

years in the past, hundreds of miles away from anybody else
I knew, with nothing to my title, having left the second  

nation of my childhood, the place T was devoured by
the dragon on his again, and P, and C, and C, and J, and H  

are buried alongside my childhood, grinning like knives underneath the evergreen. Go, he’d stated, as a result of phrases are  

the closest invention now we have to the solar—they will make
something develop. I believed then of all of the locations which have  

made me go; how going is a form of life, too. Simply
yesterday, we marveled at mountains peeking their cheeks

between pristine New England gables as if asking
to be kissed, as if now we have not been their destroyers.  

My ft damage from low-cost new sneakers, and he held my hand
prefer it was a smooth, new planet whereas we climbed over the chain  

guarding the shortcut by way of the sector. Beloved, are you able to
inform me what’s the distinction between grief and gratitude;

inform me, how does the sky go on and on?

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